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Over the past few weeks we have seen letters from Helene talking about her and Vitali’s anticipated departure from Europe on the ship Ciudad de Sevilla – see posts from May 29 and June 13. The saga continues in today’s letter to her children Eva and Harry.
Vienna, 19 June 1941
My dear children! The obstacle course is not over yet. We have everything except the visas. Since the American consulate general is closed this month from the 15-30th, we cannot apply for the transit visa for Spain and Portugal until we have the American one. Originally, we were supposed to leave Europe on the Ciudad de Sevilla on July 15, but I can’t imagine that that will be possible since our passports will have to be sent to Berlin to get transit visas issued.
Vitali cannot understand that my dark mood is still continuing, even though we are so close to our goal. I am inconsolable because except for your two letters from the beginning of May, I have heard nothing from you. Although I am very busy with my travel preparations, the thought of what you are probably doing doesn’t leave me for a moment and the 14 days in which the consulate is on vacation seem unending to me.
Our store is no longer in our possession since the 15th of this month. However, Papa is still going there for an hour or two every day as long as we’re here. The new business will not open until the fall, so Vitali can continue to do his “stressful work” from 1200-1300 and from 1700-1800.
There is really nothing new to tell you. I hope that we will soon receive the summons for the doctor’s exam soon – i.e., soon after the opening of the holy doors of your consulate so that the sending and returning of our passports can happen in good time and we will still catch the small family rowboat. We are trying to send our luggage ahead and we are waiting every hour for permission from customs. We are weighing our hand luggage every day and hoping and hoping that it will become lighter by the time we leave.
I would love to know if you have gotten letters from us. Papa sings Manon while he is shaving – that is, my trained ear is hearing what he is trying to sing. He is in a good mood. He sometimes bellows out “He hombre” and when I look up in horror, he says, “oh that will be a great hurry when I call Harry that from the train station.” Well, it’s more than just a rush for me – it’s the fulfillment of the goal of my life -- I am so looking forward to it, but it’s more than singing He hombre can express. Cross your fingers, my little bunnies, that the last stage of our waiting is not delayed longer by any circumstances. I am dying to see you and hold you in my arms. The greatest happiness is waiting for us, although it is a leap into the unknown as far as the possibility of our existence, but Papa just laughs away my concerns about this.
Please greet all the dear ones and friends from us and cross your fingers, cross your fingers. I kiss you, I am yours, and I am still waiting so fervently for you
Helen
I often felt that my mother didn’t feel loved and appreciated for who she was. Eva was a strong, independent, intelligent, and often stubborn woman who had to grow up very quickly. In her 20s she found herself more in the role of parent than child while helping her mother make her way to San Francisco and settle here. When Eva and Harry came over, she never felt wanted – the story she told me was that young Harry had so charmed the American relatives when they visited Vienna in the 1930s that when it was clear things were heating up in Europe, they wrote to Helene and encouraged her to send him to be safe in their care. Helene would only send Harry if Eva went with him, and Eva felt that she was unwanted and barely tolerated. I don’t think she ever outgrew that feeling. These letters from Helene are so loving, warm, and witty – I hope that Eva believed her mother’s words and that they made her feel loved and valued, if only for a little while.